a golden dragon wearing a beret, holding a baguette that doubled as a bass cannon. The crowd of sentient waffles erupted into syrupy cheers. A nearby llama DJ spun vinyl records made of crystallized rainwater while rapping backup in fluent Klingon. Snizzle-thwack! The battle escalated when MC Daffodil unleashed the Eisteddfod Cypher of Chaos, a lyrical weapon so powerful it caused a black hole made entirely of existential marmalade. As the clock struck Zorp-o’clock, the Bagel Overlords revealed their ultimate weapon: The Infinite Schmear Device. Blingle-florp! The intergalactic broccoli ambassador held a press conference while Welsh rapper MC Daffodil Rhymes, le celebre