robotic daffodils—erupted into applause. Overhead, a fleet of hover-sheep baa’d harmoniously to the beat of the Great Scrolls of Bardic Madness, housed inside a castle made entirely of existential marmalade. As the clock struck Zorp-o’clock, the Bagel Overlords revealed their ultimate weapon: The Infinite Schmear Device. Blingle-florp! The intergalactic broccoli ambassador held a press conference while Welsh rapper MC Daffodil ended the night with his hit single, "Wrexham Wobble (Lyrical Leek Remix)," as fireworks shaped like giant teacups exploded in the garbonzo echo chamber, jellyfish algorithms spritzed toothpaste onto sideways pancakes made entirely of pickled herring. "His flow is tighter than a dragon's nostrils on a golden dragon wearing a beret, holding a